I’m pleased to announce that, as of October 15th, The Scribbler has gone Premium! In addition to ad-free viewing and improved customization, this means that TheScribb1er.wordpress.com is now TheScribblerMag.com. Web traffic should be automatically redirected to my custom domain, so if you’re reading this as a fan or follower, I have good news for you: it’s working! (Don’t you just love it when technology does that without being asked, forced, kicked, yelled at, or otherwise abused? Ghosts of TVs Past, take note.)

In other news, I’m finally (over-)packed and (over-)prepared for my road trip! Whether or not I’m “ready” for it is another matter. I wish I had time to tell you everything I went through to get here, but it’s been a looong day’s night and I need my beauty sleep. Suffice it to say that Adrianne/Adrienne (two A’s or two E’s?) finally passed smog four months late, a few hours before her check engine light came on again.

According to SmogTips.com, the odds of restoring the engine computer’s readiness flags before any trouble codes trigger the light are “slim to none.” Fortunately, I trusted my gut instinct about the timing instead of my ex-mechanic or I would’ve had to pay for more repairs. He claimed that a vehicle can’t pass smog until the flags are ready, but one of the smog technicians said that a vehicle can’t legally pass smog until the flags are ready. So, it’s not a question of not being able to run the appropriate tests but of having to wait for the appropriate flags: as long as there were no trouble codes, the vehicle would assumably pass, just like my State Farm insurance agent told me.

But that’s not why I broke up with my new mechanic. I broke up with my new mechanic because he used my number to harass me about my car and then made out that I was insulting his integrity when I confronted him about this unethical behavior within earshot of his wife.

Men.

But I digress.

It’ll take the DMV about a month to send me the registration tags, but I hope that bringing the paperwork and putting a charming (?) note in the back window will prevent Adrianne/Adrienne from getting ticketed or towed. I had her professionally cleaned, inside and out, for the first time in her long life, and she’s soon-to-be stocked with every essential. This includes:

  • A first aid kit with a tiny compass
  • A human-sized compass
  • Two Swiss Army knives
  • A much more dangerous looking corkscrew
  • A manly Stanley flask with an irresistibly regal bear
  • Four mini-bottles of white zinfandel
  • A small funnel for pouring said wine into said flask
  • The prerequisite “emergency snacks”
  • A small, sporty duffel bag just for shoes
  • A Shakespeare quote tote for my new MacBook
  • And enough clothes to last me from California to Timbukto

If Adrianne/Adrienne cooperates, I plan to take the I-10 to the I-95 on my way there and the I-81 or I-85 to the I-40 on my way back. I’m not sure how much time I’ll have for social media, but I hope to keep a travelogue travelblog as I go along and pitch some longer articles to publications when I get back. For the love of simplicity, photos will likely be posted to my Instagram and selectively added to the travelblog later. I can’t make any promises, but I’ll try to get into as much trouble for you as a Good Girl can (wink). By the time you read this, I could be halfway to Joshua Tree!

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